The 1975 concert



{Glitter ,glue from Kiko, on my cheeks and tip of the nose, I felt a little like rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, no makeup besides the glitter as it was so hot and everything would’ve melted anyways!}

Halla Friends,

I need to share this experience with the world, because it was my first real concert ever. Yes I am 18, no I am not ashamed of that fact, that at 18 it was my first. This year is just filled with firsts and new experiences and I have to say, I was so scared, that I would get a panic attack, but I did not. That’s life, my friends, going to a concert of a band you like and enjoying every moment of it without problems, without your psyche going crazy like always! I have to admit, I am not the hu-gest fan of the 1975, but I really like their music and so it was perfect, because if I wouldn’t have felt good, I could have gone without really crying, because it’s not like Angus&Julia Stone or Lorde or Jose Gonzalez or Birdie or all the other nice bands/musicians out there. It was the perfect opportunity to test it all out. This was the sleepless Saturday for me:

  1. Get in bed at 1 a.m in the morning after a birthday party
  2. Get u at half past 4 a.m in the morning to drive to the concert hall
  3. Wait for 7 hours in front of the concert hall to get special tickets in order to get in before anyone else
  4. Go to a flea market at 1 p.m and spend all your money on vintage/retro things
  5. Go home, shower and make a lunch pack
  6. Wait in front of the concert call yet again at 4 p.m
  7. Eat while you wait in line
  8. Get in at around 5:30 p.m and wait another hour until the first band starts to perform for half an hour
  9. Witt until 7 p.m until the magic happens and you can enjoy everything from the third row!
  10. Go to bed at half past 11 p.m and sleep

In total, I’ve slept 6 out of 24 h on that day. Graceful tiredness following the next day(s). Totally worth it tough, I enjoyed the atmosphere so so much, everyone happy, singing and beautiful as everyone put on nice makeup. They all had such a cool fashion style- grunge and rock-ish, not m style anymore, but still really cool! I was a little bit overwhelmed by all the beautiful girls and there were so little guys, haha! But I think I’ll get used to all these ‘cool’ kids by the next concerts.

Next Stop(s): Angus & Julia Stone and Lorde !

Which concerts have you attended so far? Have you dressed up like we did? Where are you going next/want to really go?

Much Love.







Moving On|Room diy’s


Halla Friends,

today it’s finally time for another moving progress post! Yes I know I am already done with my moving, but some of you were really interested in what I wanted to do, so I am sharing 4 little diy’s today for room furniture, vintage inspired of course, because you know me! Hope you are a excited for it as I am, I’ve already gotten so many compliments on my stuff, and in my opinion it wasn’t at all difficult to make, cheap as well, so let’s get crafting!

Seashell Earrings-Holder

This isn’t really a crafting-project, but I upcycled my old seashells, that were really big (too big for another diy in this post) and now use them as the containers for my earrings. It’s as easy as that, grab your old seashells (or buy them a flea market or somewhere where they sell seashells) and put your little teeny tiny stuff in there, so pretty and now I am more tempted to change it up more often!




Now if you don’t want to ruin your vintage suitcase (that reminds me A LOT of Newt Scamanders), here’s the solution: Just use an old table, that might even be really low and small, as long as your suitcase fits onto it. Mine is overlapping at the sides as well, but I really like it that way, because you can’t see the edges too much! Then put anything in there, mostly stuff you don’t need everyday (for me, there are ALL my fabrics stored) and put your other stuff you need near your bed on top. You can even put boxes beneath the table, it’s so much space!

Fun Fact: Behind my boxes are actually two bottles of wine, that my mom bought my dad (one for him) and her (one for her) the year I was born and that she ave my dad to be drunk when I turn 18. We still haven’t done it, but it’ll be soon! I wonder if they even taste good anymore, because they were really badly bedded.


Hat Storage

Now this is my solution to my constantly growing hat-collection. I’ve grown to love hats in the winter time and I am planning on adding summer ones to my collection as well! It’s as simple as this: I took three cords (that you use to wrap a packet for more safety) and braided them, they should have about the length where you want to hang it up. This takes approximately the most time. then you hang it up and use wood pegs to hand up your hats! Done, no mess, happy hat-wearing.




This is probably the most difficult one, you need old vinyls (it would be best in the 3 different sizes, but I could only find two and it works as well), oval metal Rods with central holes (I got mine here), a oven and oven-proof bowls (ceramic)

Preheat your oven 50-75 grad celsius, turn around the bowl, so the bottom is facing you, then place the records on top of the bowl and put it into the oven. Have an eye out of it, it should form in a few minutes, then quickly (!!!) get em out, form them a little with your fingers and let them cool on top of the bowl. Repeat it two more times and thats it! Now you put together all three into a étagère . You can also leave the bowl (you can’t put them into the dishwasher or wash them with hot water as they might deform a little then!

I am storing my makeup in there now, but before that I used it for my fruits and spices. Have fun with all the day’s and let me know what you think of them!

Much Love.



feminist thinkin' · inspirin'

Girl Crushes

Halla Friends,

today I’ll talk about the most amazing gals, that I’ve yet discovered and that inspire me so so much! Let’s get going and support each other, girls! They all inspire me on other loves, too. It not just, they have such a unique, retro and vintage fashion style. They are creative, maybe awesome music, do cosplays, make brooches or even sew clothes themselves. Let’s all follow them and tell me who are your inspirations?

|| I've been wanting to listen to some new artists! Suggestions, anyone??💘||

A post shared by Allison Young (@allisonnlovess) on

|| Its May 5th and I'm in a turtleneck because it's cold outside…idk how to feel about it.||

A post shared by Allison Young (@allisonnlovess) on


A post shared by julie🐝 (@lilbeejulie) on

🦊⭐️ @allisonnlovess

A post shared by julie🐝 (@lilbeejulie) on


A post shared by julie🐝 (@lilbeejulie) on


A post shared by Kaufmann Angie🎈 (@angiekyra) on

🌼 #1940#1940s#forties#40s#1940shair#vintagestyle#vintagefashion

A post shared by Kaufmann Angie🎈 (@angiekyra) on

🍥🍥🍥 #1940#1940s#forties#1940sfashion#pincurls#vintagehair#1940shair @laurakamuti

A post shared by Kaufmann Angie🎈 (@angiekyra) on

Grandma's porch hangs in this sweet little daisy number from @sweetbeefinds 🎀

A post shared by Amanda – Modern "June" Cleaver (@modernjunecleaver) on

That’s it, finally, but I could go on like that for ever!

Much Love.


New Projects|Fashion, Cookbook, Posting


Halla Friends,

as I told you in my last post, I am contemplating, again!

Contemplating and sewing my life. This is also my new favorite word/phrase. Sewing my life together. I mean just read it and re-read it again and again, I’ve decided to live the life I imagine and that’s thanks to so many people, who you are going to read about next week this time!

Blog Content and Posting Schedule

I’ve finally decided, what I want my Instagram and Blog to be about. I’ve been struggling with my content these past weeks and I wasn’t at all happy, with what I created. I had so much inspiration, but I just didn’t feel happy about my outcome. Constantly comparing myself and making myself less, and that has got to stop! I now know, that at the moment and maybe in my far future even I want my content to go into retro and vintage fashion. That means, this is my blog about what I wore, entering the journey into 20s-60s fashion. Those are the decades, that (if I am hones with myself for like 8 years) inspire me the most and I love watching old movies, read old magazines and of old stories. The ladies and gents of those times are just the coolest of the block and it makes my heart flit and happy, when I wear clothes inspired or from that time! Let’s start this journey of 20s flapper sequins, 30s skirts, 40s trousers, 50s dresses and 60s rock n’ roll chic.

I am also trying to post regularly from now on, every Wednesday, Friday and Sunday at 12 a.m will be a new post. I’ll post Outfits on Friday and Sunday and what is inspiring on my retro journey/sewing/diy-ing on Wednesdays, just some fun stuff while we have managed to get to the middle of the week! I hope to keep this up while posting at least once a day on Instagram, always  my outfit and something else if I have made/eaten nice food, seen a cool series or something, that inspires me, too! Wish me luck for that.




Yay! I want to get over this cooking slump, that I have been experiencing these past months (around 2 nayyyy) and I have ordered the classic french cookbook “Mastering the Art of french Cooking” by Julia Child. Yes, I did this after watching the genius movie Julie&Julia with Meryl Streep as Julia Child and yes I’ve gotten the plan to cook every recipe out of this book, but dear god, not in one year, I’ll give myself more time. If it’s just one recipe a week, then I am happy and enjoying some good french dishes. I mean who doesn’t love quiche, tartes, croissants, poulets etc.? Who? My friends are invited to join in my feasts!

Waking up

Next up I#ve got this plan not sleep in too long anymore, because when I’ve slept until 11 a.m. I am so tired, still and I cannot get my butt off to work a little. That’s maybe also a reason, why my time management isn’t the best at times, tough I do much stuff, but guess I could do with a little less stress. So waking up between 6 and 9 a.m. every day (around 6 for school days and around 8 for weekends and such). This is one task I guess.


Next up I really want to not only sew when I have school break, but also when I am in school, it should fit into my time management now and how else am I going to be happy, while improving my skills and providing content for my blog and my life?

Art , Books,Music and Fresh Air

I also want to make more art again, not like everyday, but I haven’t been drawing for like 6 months which isn’t satisfying at all. Like at all and I’ve become really bad, so let’s start that up again. Also I really want to play more on the Ukulele, but do you know this fact: I am so lazy. Get over it, gal! Now something that I let down a lot these past months is my love for reading, I’ve been getting into watching series and movies again, but I really want to read in the evening before I fall asleep, I think that’ll really calm me down, make me sleepy and ready for a next day. Finally I want to get outside everyday for at least 30 minutes, walking, riding my bike or even doing some sports, just some sun and fresh air would be good for my psyche.

Well it’s a lot, but now that I’ve gotten more time again, I really want to take on my hobbies again. The things that make me even happier!

Much Love.



10 movie reviews

DSC_0062Dear friends, in the last months I watched many many movies, mainly in the holidays, because I finally had time and energy to do so in the evenings. Normally I just eat and go to bed, because I am way too tired to do anything else but stroll through Instagram or sleep, ha! Now I present you 10 reviews of movies I watched, I’ll all rate them with 1-5 stars 🌟 , depending on much I liked them or not. Mind you I love watching films and series and I think they are extremely inspiring, not only on my fashion style, but also how I think about the world and how I feel. I am trying not to be too easily manipulated, but like everything else, I can’t help but get influences by books and movies and internet people. Let’s get rollin’

Now is Good

“Tessa is seventeen and passionate about life. Diagnosed with a terminal illness, she determines to use every moment, compiling a catalogue of what normal teenager would experience, including losing her virginity and taking drugs. With the help of her friend, she sets the list in motion. And while her parents and brother each deals with their fear of losing her in their own way, Tessa explores a whole new world, determined to live every day as intensely as possible. Falling in love with Adam, her new neighbor, wasnt on the list, but it proves to be the most exhilarating experience of them all.” (source)

This is a tissue-in -our-hands-the-whole-time movie and let me tell you it is a great movie. If you like romance, if you like coming-of-age, if you like a bit of rebellion against the rest of your world and if you like all that mixed up with a little bit of deeper stuff, this is for you. I really enjoyed watching this film and I love all the actors in their roles, of course it’s sad, but it’s also beautiful and I can only say it is worth watching. You’ll feel kind of relieved or hopeful afterwards, very inspiring!

I’d give: 🌟🌟🌟🌟

The perks of being a Wallflower

“Based on the novel written by Stephen Chbosky, this is about 15-year-old Charlie (Logan Lerman), an endearing and naive outsider, coping with first love (Emma Watson), the suicide of his best friend, and his own mental illness while struggling to find a group of people with whom he belongs. The introvert freshman is taken under the wings of two seniors, Sam and Patrick, who welcome him to the real world.” (source)

Personally, this is one of my favorite movies of all time, not only because it is also one of my favorite books of all time, but because it is so beautifully made. The vintage vibes and the great actors. In my opinion it isn’t too typical of a american movie, like they almost always are, if they are set in high schools, but it goes deeper within. It isn’t too different from the novel either and everything is just in harmony. Again, it is a coming-of-age movie, which I obviously like and it is also a movie where there will be some tears falls down on the couch. But just see it. Love it!

I’d give: 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Paper towns

“Adapted from the bestselling novel by author John Green, PAPER TOWNS is a coming-of-age story centering on Quentin and his enigmatic neighbor Margo, who loved mysteries so much she became one. After taking him on an all-night adventure through their hometown, Margo suddenly disappears – leaving behind cryptic clues for Quentin to decipher. The search leads Quentin and his quick-witted friends on an exhilarating adventure that is equal parts hilarious and moving. Ultimately, to track down Margo, Quentin must find a deeper understanding of true friendship – and true love.” (source)

To be honest, I did not like this movie. I mean I like some of John Green’s novels and I loved the fault in our stars (movie and book), but this movie is just unrealistic, too american and completely boring. I was glad when it was over and in my opinion not worth the time. Nothing more to add.

I’d give: 🌟

Silver Linings

“Pat Solitano (Bradley Cooper), who has bipolar disorder, is released from a mental health facility into the care of his parents after eight months of treatment. He learns that his wife, Nikki (Brea Bee), has moved away and his father, Pat Sr. (Robert De Niro), is out of work and resorting to bookmaking to earn money to start a restaurant. Pat is determined to get his life back on track and reconcile with Nikki, who obtained a restraining order against him after the violent episode that sent him away.” (source)

I’ve seen this movie twice now and it was still as good the second time as it was the first time. You will laugh, laugh, laugh, even tough it has such a (for me) scary plot with all he mental illness and stuff. But they didn’t make it unrealistic, it was just cranky, funny, and beautiful in one. You’ll learn so much more about mental illnesses and about people and how you can love each other and just be yourself! Watch! Now!

I’d give: 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟


“In New Holland, the boy Victor Frankenstein is a bright but outcast student without any friend but his dog Sparky. When the newcomer science teacher Mr. Rzykruski challenges the students to participate in the science fair, Victor’s father forces him to play baseball otherwise he would not sign the necessary authorization for his son. During the game, Sparky chases the ball and is hit by a car. Victor recalls Mr. Rzykruski’s class about the effects of electricity and successfully resuscitates Sparky using lightning. Victor hides Sparky in the attic but the weird Edgar sees the dog on the garden and blackmails Victor to learn how to bring the dead to life. Edgar does not keep the secret and soon Victor’s envious schoolmates revive several creatures to win the science fair contest. When the town is invaded by the monsters, Victor and Sparky are the last chance to rescue the girl Elsa van Helsing from the claws of Mr. Whiskers.” (source)

I love tim Burton movies, but I have to say, that this one wasn’t as interesting as the rest of his work. I especially love his real action movies, but I also like his animations and style. In my opinion it was a little boring, it wasn’t scary, but I also enjoyed it because of the artwork and how the story is adapted from frankenstein, but something completely different and very creative. I think this is a must-watch for my friends Kathi from teepüppchen.

I’d give: 🌟🌟🌟


North Sea Texas

“A young Pim and his mother, Yvette, live in the Belgian countryside with their dog, a Miniature Pinscher named Mirza. The mother, a lonely divorcee, plays a piano accordion, and patronizes a local bar called Texas. One day Pim and his mother attend a fair, where they meet a traveling carny named Zoltan. Zoltan is kind to the younger Pim, and Pim is infatuated. Zoltan rents a room in Yvette’s home intermittently, but later stops coming to town. Meanwhile, Yvette begins spending time with a man named Etienne, who is brutish and macho, and whom Pim immediately despises.” (source)

This movie is of a completely different style than the normal hollywood films. I enjoyed it, especially the subject of the film, as to me it is very interesting how other people try to portray it. In my opinion homosexuality was portrayed as a completely accepted kind of love. Not like in most stories, where the boys (or girls) have problems because of their orientation, this is what I best liked about the movie. It is also coming-of-age and the cinematography is very great, I really enjoyed this alternative movie!

I’d give: 🌟🌟🌟🌟

If I stay

“Mia Hall thought the hardest decision she would ever face would be whether to pursue her musical dreams at Juilliard or follow a different path to be with the love of her life, Adam. But what should have been a carefree family drive changes everything in an instant, and now her own life hangs in the balance. Caught between life and death for one revealing day, Mia has only one decision left, which will not only decide her future but her ultimate fate.” (source)

This movie is also a coming-of-age movie, so naturally I enjoyed it. It was so heartbreaking, but also so heartwarming at the same time. It inspired me a lot to do my own thing and to just wait and see what’ll happen. That there’s a person for everyone out there who’ll love you-your soulmate. It also teaches you to enjoy the moment. I loved this movie I’definitely watch it again.

I’d give: 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟


The Incredibles

“Bob Parr (A.K.A. Mr. Incredible), and his wife Helen (A.K.A. Elastigirl), are the world’s greatest famous crime-fighting superheroes in Metroville. Always saving lives and battling evil on a daily basis. But fifteen years later, they have been forced to adopt civilian identities and retreat to the suburbs where they have no choice but to retire as superheroes to live a “normal life” with their three children Violet, Dash and Jack-Jack (who were secretly born with superpowers). Itching to get back into action, Bob gets his chance when a mysterious communication summons him to a remote island for a top secret assignment. He soon discovers that it will take a super family effort to rescue the world from total destruction.” (source)

I liked this movie, but it wasn’t something special. I a now 18 years old, so I don’t connect it with my childhood. I think it’s a great movie for kids, with a learning-effect, too, but not my kind of tuna any more, hm.

I’d give: 🌟🌟


Maria, ihm schmeckt’s nicht

“Jan wants to marry the German-Italian Sara. Nothing spectacular. Just a small civil marriage. But then Jan had not quite reckoned with his future father-in-law. Antonio, who had come to Germany in 1965 as a guest worker and is married to the German Ursula, insists on having the wedding in Southern Italy. Basta! Jan, Sara, and her parents set off to Campobello to organize the large wedding with the entire clan. Confronted with a southern temperament, foreign cuisine, soft beds and rigid bureaucracy, Jan is forced to ask himself one day whether Sara and her family are really the right thing for him…” (source)

This movie was funny, but it stretched out so far, at least that is how I felt. Like I’ve sat there for forever. Still it was a really good cliche german-italian movie, I feel like both nationalities are very well portrayed and I think it’s really cool for foreigners to watch, haha.

I’d give: 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟


“Theodore is a lonely man in the final stages of his divorce. When he’s not working as a letter writer, his down time is spent playing video games and occasionally hanging out with friends. He decides to purchase the new OS1, which is advertised as the world’s first artificially intelligent operating system, “It’s not just an operating system, it’s a consciousness,” the ad states. Theodore quickly finds himself drawn in with Samantha, the voice behind his OS1. As they start spending time together they grow closer and closer and eventually find themselves in love. Having fallen in love with his OS, Theodore finds himself dealing with feelings of both great joy and doubt. As an OS, Samantha has powerful intelligence that she uses to help Theodore in ways others hadn’t, but how does she help him deal with his inner conflict of being in love with an OS?” (source)

Whoop the last movie, which was completely different than what I expected it to be, but actually really good. I liked the cinematography (it had something from wes anderson) and also the futuristic feel. I think it is a must watch, but everyone has to make up thrown mind weather one likes it or not.

I’d give: 🌟🌟🌟🌟


This was a lot of work, so I hope someone enjoys it! xx



Augsburg Haul|Lingerie, Fabric & co


Hello friends,

these are my finds from the lovely city Augsburg, where I went to a few weeks ago. I am sorry it takes all so long, but I am so so busy, like a little bee and it’s so nice out, so I trie and take in as much sunshine as possibly, but I won’t stop blogging! It’s just too nice to listen to great music outside and read new book and be young and free and be positive and negative and have hard times and happy times. Let’s see what I bought tough, just scroll through!


Lingerie from Intimissimi 

I have loved wearing their bras in the last weeks, they are just so so comfortable and make such good-looking breasts, ha! What more do we want, comfort and prettyness, just look at these colors. And no, I am not ashamed to unwrap myself from all clothing but my underwear in public as to get more chances of browning. But don’t ask me what I spend at that shop, just don’t.DSC_0070

My friend and I also bought these spoon straws made of metal, which is so much better for the environment, because you can re-use it! Baby steps to a better planet. It is from the german brand WMF, and they make great silverware, too!

The tea is from a shop named Nature&Decouvertes, which is a very cool french shop with lots of gimmicks, books, tea and whatnot. This tea just smelled so great and I want to do a chai latte with it so badly!


The perfume is from Intimissimi and it’s called “Unica”.


Last but not least, lots of fabrics for two dresses and one jumpsuit, fingers crossed I#ll make them in my school break! I am really aching to wear ’em. They are all from the amazing store Augsburger Restehaus.



Munich Places|collab with Arianna


Hey Friends, today I share with you my very favorite places in Munich, round one, and hopefully I’ll experience and see many new things in my hometown this year, so that there will be a round two one day! This is a collar with my friend Arianna from RosyVogue, she is amazing and wonderful and the sweetest person, please visit her page and give her a cheeky little follow as she shares with you her favorite places in her hometown, visit her blog to find out where it is! (mysterious…) She also blogs about fashion, beauty, does interviews and talks about stings like creativity or what she loves.

Now let’s get exploring Munich, the heart of Bavaria.

1. Above you can see a place, I’ve aways dreamed of living in. It is so quiet and peaceful there, it almost feels like the cosy home of the Weasleys. It is located in the “Au” in the “Am Wageeck” street. Whoever lives there will haunt me. Generally is the Au a very special place in the heart of the city, where there are still small houses and people actually live in there. It feels like you are a bit on the countryside – just a bit tough.DSC_0052DSC_0050DSC_00482. The “Auer Dult” is four times a year in Munich at the Maria-Hilf-Platz, normally there is a food market on Wednesdays, but when you are lucky and visit the city at one of the dates, where it is, you can find anything from typical german food, international sweets, antiques, candles, soaps, kitchen supplies, like anything, there. I cannot go off the market without my beloved turkish nougat, it reminds me of times, when I went with my mom and I had to buy it at the same stand-it’s the same line-up every time!DSC_0039DSC_0040DSC_0047DSC_0044DSC_0045DSC_0043DSC_0041DSC_00773. This is a small place just kind of below the bridge and every time I look at it, it reminds me of a quiet, mysterious place, where I would meet my best friend as a kid. It is on the Corneliusbrücke (bridge).DSC_0038DSC_0037neu4. My favorite place to get away from all the stress of the city has got to be the Isar, especially when it is cold and misty outside. On sunny days it’s perfect for enjoying sun while having a long walk, but it’s also so crowded then. On bad rainy days, you are only going to see the one or two obligatory dog walker.DSC_0036DSC_00325. I love letters and postcards and everything you get in the mail. This is how a Munich/german letterbox looks like – in case you were searching for one, like I always am in foreign countries.DSC_00306. I love the tiny shops at and around the Gärtnerplatz, like the sign from above says “Choose yourself”. Down is the Gärtnerplatztheater (theatre), which will open soon, again, hopefully, as it is being renovated currently.DSC_0023DSC_00277. Best. Food-Bookshop. Ever. Reichenbachstraße 15, 80469 MünchenDSC_0020DSC_0019DSC_00178. The best pizzeria in Munich is in my opinion my long-loved Monaco. It is located in the Reichenbachstraße 10, 80469 München – get anything from the menu and you won’t regret it! It has gotten a little pricey, tough.

After your glorious meal, you don’t want to miss the best gelato of Munich, don’t you? They have so, so so many favors to choose from, so delicious-especially when it is sunny and a long, long crowd around the Al Teatro wanting a ice cream cone! It is located just in front of the Monaco (pizzeria).DSC_0016neu9. This old cinema, the Museum Lichtspiele, is iconic here (best smelling cinema there is!) – it has been screening the Rocky Horror Show every weekend for I think over 25 years, yet I still haven’t managed to visit it, but I will this year! It is located in the Lilienstraße 2, 81669 München.DSC_006210. If you wanna have a little swim, visit my favorite swimming place, the Müllersche Volksbad, it is really old and it looks so cool, when you are inside, do try it out and have a look yourself! It is located in the Rosenheimer Str. 1, 81667 München.

DSC_006311. This was my old favorite place to go when my brain was too fill- a kind-of tree house. Don’t try it when it is slippery and wet (!), it is dangerous enough as it is, but I loved sitting at he end of the tree and just forgetting about time with my friend while eating marshmallows. It is located at the Praterinsel (you have to search for a bit, it is located more under the DAV Museum and you’ll have to go a little further into the woods).DSC_006612. If you go even further, there is the not-so-dangerous place, that I love to hang out, when it is not flooded with water, you can actually sit on the stones and watch the river Isar, it almost feels like you are sitting on the water, then!DSC_0065


My body, your body, our bodies|Body Positivity


What I am wearing: second hand jumper/dress, Primark tights, vintage belt, accessorize earrings 

Hello Friends,

today I want to share my story with my body and some things I kind of learned along the way, to kickstart this series on my blog. This topic is so huge to females and especially young ones like myself. At such a young age we start to question our figure, eating habits, sport routines and weight. What should be wrong with it, which picture are the medias giving us about the perfect body? There are young girls, even 10-year-old struggling with real eating disorders like anorexia nervosa or bulimia, those cases get younger and younger every year and they get more. When we come to think about this illness, it’s that it probably only exists in the 1st world, because we would have enough of everything and still we are not satisfied. I don’t want to make anyone battling with this bad, I have struggled with it myself for a long and hard time and I now wish, I would never have started with this wholly wrong ideology.

Of course it all started when I was quite young, around 14, I guess, when I became vegetarian, for ethical reasons, but if I am being honest, I asked my friend explicitly if she lost weight after going vegetarian. She did and that was enough for me, still I ate very much and I loved food and cooking. It was one of my favorite hobbies, cooking and eating, especially with friends. I ate very much and people began to tell me, that they thought it was unusual, how much I ate. I want t remind you, that I was very skinny, slightly curvy around the hips, I had a very good figure, now I know that! They asked me, where I put all the stuff I was eating, because I wasn’t taking on weight, but I, of course, knew, where it all went. I saw all the places every bite went, still I was hungry all the time and I ate. At times in 10th grade when I wasn’t feeling well, mentally, I hopped onto the train of going vegan. That was after my move into a very small town, I was feeling like a waste of time and all, so I thought I should do something good for the environment and all and even healthier than I already did. Everything had to be organic and fresh and green and fruity, seeds and all. You might know what I mean, what was in my small little brain. No sugar, no while flour, no fat, no sweets, no chips, no crisps, no. So I went vegan, full on, for a month, even doing the rawtill4 etc., until someone good awoke me out of my delirium. Then it was better again, tough I had taken on weight when I was eating vegan. That was weird, in hindsight, I don’t understand it until today. The thing is I never weighted myself, but I think I was always around a number, but I never tried to lose weight and weight myself like every day. That’s not me. Then came eleventh grade and I was still feeling miserable, I was feeling bad with my friends,with everything, I didn’t think I was good enough. So I skipped meals, because I thought I didn’t deserve it for whatever reason. There were reasons, but no reasons are big enough to hurt yourself, none! You are just as important as any one human being! There’s hope for everyone!

Don’t think you can get out of a eating disorder yourself, please get help, no matter at what stadium you are! And please don’t think like I did, that you could stop at a certain weight, you won’t be able, because you are afraid to take it all on in no time. The secret I am going to tell you now is, you won’t. It takes so much time and effort, it is very hard, but it is good. Gosh, so good. You can live again, don’t starve yourself for anyone or anything. You deserve indulgence and it does not matter which size you are!

I really want to accept my body how it healthily (has become such a important word to me) is and I want to embrace every body type there is. What would we be if we all looked the same, same old matches. You’ll enjoy life and everything that comes with it 100 % more, when you love yourself. I can speak out of experience. I spent too long in a clinic, which helped me like nothing else. I am so grateful for everything I learned there and at my time in the flat, but I’ve still got some way to go with body acceptance and this blog is my platform for therapy, so I am kick-starting this series with the hardest part, I guess.

Accepting my history and moving on to the next chapter.

Loving myself fully.



Moving On|Inspiration


Dear Readers,

this is the first post in my little moving series. I am moving again in 6 weeks and until then I have so much to do. This is a huge deal for me, because as the title of the series is “Moving On”, it not only has the literal meaning (which is just a writer thing I guess), but also the transferred meaning (I couldn’t find the exact word). It moving on from eating disorders, from dark room, from depression and from a cage I mostly built myself. Another step towards freedom, making my own decisions, buying my groceries, and then eating them, cleaning without someone controlling me, doing my schoolwork without help and planning my free time with friends. Going out, decorating and adult stuff like registering my new domicile, making some money and phoning my parents – visiting them.

This post is the basic step I took when it comes to all the things, that need preparing until I really move out. There’s the problem of not having basic things, like a laundry rack or a iron (which I obviously need for my sewing), then kitchen supplies and things to cook in. Some things will already will be in the shared flat, but some things I’ll have to bring myself. So I made myself these little collages. The first one is mostly inspirational pictures, of how I’d like my room to turn out like. I want it colorful, Wes Anderson-inspired and also with a retro tough to it. I don’t need much, but I do want to paint my walls white (x2), curry yellow (x1) and a papaya pink (x1). I think that will add a lot to the things I’ll bring to the room, mostly piecemeal things from home. Art is also a big thing for me and I’d like to hang up my favorite art and mostly art that I made myself, so that i get inspired to paint more, again and to be reminded of the things, that mean the most to me. I’ve also red, that yellow is a great color for concentration and so, naturally, I am planning to paint the wall where I’ll put my desk in that color. It’s be a very happy home! I have already asked a few friends, if they wanted to help me with painting them and I guess, that makes everything even more fun and exciting!

Do you have anything, that you think I really need for a retro/wes anderson – inspired room?